Ahoy!

It's Fleet Week in New York. This means there are lots of sailors in uniforms walking the streets, riding the train, and generally being un-nautical. I feel like the sailor suit is the gay equivalent of girls dressing up in slutty schoolgirl uniforms - unintentionally (?) lewd. I feel like I'm in that Cher video when I'm around them. I do however, want a picture of myself being hoisted up by six of them down near the docks.

Dear Monty...

What follows is a list of jobs I or my friends have held (or currently hold) in Montreal:

- Working in a clothing store for a women who sold stolen merchandise and drank beer on the job (that I had to buy for her)
- Editing a culture magazine owned by Hell's Angels
- PA to a 'producer' who named his 'company' after a famous beer and shot movies while wearing rollerblades. They worked out of dude's house (duh) and eventually ran out of money
- Admin assistant to obstinate and somewhat frightening Europeans who smoked wherever they wanted (despite being asked never to smoke inside) and may not have actually been able to write
- Telephone relay for deaf people. Actually a good service, but had to relay messages like 'U R a fag' on the night shift
- Subtitling movies and TV shows (kind of a sweet gig)
- Writing about the trotter races (we got to go to the Hippodrome and bet!)
- Vice intern (multiple friends have done this one. One friend got so drunk on the job he couldn't stand. Nobody noticed.)
- Server in a Hasidic restaurant where some customers wouldn't look at you and would mutter their orders unintelligibly. Sometimes a 13-year-old girl customer would scream at you

But still, we love you Montreal!

Sometimes you just need a little giraffe...

This guy!



These beauteous wonders!



Hello, gorgeous!

Big ups to Crispin Hellion Glover

Crispin Glover talks with Tom Green about the way corporate media structures its output and his desire to present something outside this paradigm to open up dialogue.



The awesome 'Clowny Clown Clown.'



His first appearance on Letterman in 1987 in costume/character.



Dancing it out.



And finally, as defiant high school hunk.

On tha REG!

Today while searching for this, a Google ad informed that "Local ladies want to give it up. Get in on the action!" What does this mean? Local ladies want to give up smoking? Good for them! And I should get in on [this] action? Like, I should support a local woman in her quest to give up smoking? I guess I could give away free nicotine patches outside of the subway? I dunno, it was just a weird suggestion from an ad I thought. What should I do, Internet? How can I best get in on the action?

Venn Diagrams

Enough said.

This Venn diagram taken from this site.

No Regrets

I rediscovered a classic today.

Helen Killer says it all better than I can, so peep Regretsy!

My Greatest Concern Finally Addressed!

In keeping with an Easter theme, I thought I'd share information from an interesting article I found that addresses everyone's biggest concern...

Who will care for my pets left behind by the rapture?

A new service promises to put your pet in the hands of a caring atheist on Judgement Day. The company is called Eternal Earth-Bound Pets. It was created by an atheist, and the small fees it generates are donated to a local food bank. The creator - no, not that creator!- Bart Centre, who obviously is using a totally made up ridiculous name, came up with the idea while working on his book and trying to find out how to made money from the Rapture hysteria.

Here is my favourite quote:
"This paradox poses a challenge for Centre. He must reassure the Rapture crowd that his pet rescuers are wicked enough to be left behind but good enough to take proper care of the abandoned pets."

You can read the full article here. 

Where do I sign up?

I will survive!

With Easter coming up, I'm thinking I should have given up wasting time on YouTube for lent...

Enjoy!

What is happening here?

This guy (John O'Regan) used to write small songs about staying inside and being quiet. Now he's aping gay/Ziggy Stardust era-Bowie/old school hip hop?! Whatever@hotmail.gov!

DIAMOND RINGS:





Catchy (and still caring)!

P.S. Yes, I suppose The D'Urbervilles were a sort of stepping stone.

Stop Lecturing on My Wall!

Don't you hate it when your mom asks you to take the rims off the Bentley? Check out this hilarious article!